Friday, June 28, 2013

Don't sit in the thing this time...

In October of 2010 we found a disemboweled something that had fought it's way out of the cat and won. You can read about it here. I reference the post because at the time, "The Thing" disappeared... Did the cat re-eat the now, dead-for-sure-Thing? Did it slither away because it wasn't really dead? Was it a Squirrel Zombie? Have not thought about The Thing in a very long time...until Last Night...(BUM-BUM-BUMMMM!)

I went out to sit on my balcony and sat in my favorite wicker was raining, so I didn't think anything of the damp arse I was experiencing...until I went in and the children began to scream because there were squirrel guts and an eye ball hanging from my rear end. Yup, either the cat left me a disemboweled squirrel or there is a Squirrel Zombie attack going on. Either way, I think we can all agree on    "EEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" for the rest of my life! Needless to say, I threw out the sun dress I had to shimmy down out of and scrubbed by butt...but I still have a memory of it and EEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Perhaps it was the sight of that eye ball bouncing off of my dress and across the tiled floor that has me, well, floored.

It got me thinking about that post (the one you can get to by clicking on "here" up there) so I went looking for it. There was just something about the whole event that got me to thinking about how "A Thing" in our life can pop up over and over and over again kind of like a Squirrel Zombie. I've certainly had my share of Squirrel Zombie attacks in this life. 

There is not just one defining moment that that makes up the life of a Mair...Name that ONE defining moment? Which one is it...and why, at various points, am I in the middle of examining a new aspect of anyone moment. 

At the time, I wrote the last post I used this verse: 

"I am the door (gate); whoever enters through me will be saved. He will come in and go out, and find pasture." John 9:10

Today I saw this: 
Hmmm...Could our Heavenly Father use a Squirrel Zombie to get my attention? Not sure I am going to examine the significance of squirrel innards on my arse much longer...but I am going to examine this verse and all the ones surrounding it over the next few days. 

Monday, June 24, 2013

Don't play right...

"Jesus went on to say, "To what, then, can I compare the people of this generation? What are they like? They are like children sitting in the marketplace and calling out to each other: "'We played the pipe for you, and you did not dance; we sang a dirge, and you did not cry.'" Luke 7:31-32

I've read it a million times, probably acted it out in Godspell too since the same verse appears in Matthew. Never, ever knew what it meant.

I love the fact that Jesus didn't play right...Dig around that verse and see that no one could figure this guy out. He was suppose to act a certain way and here He was a friend of tax collectors and sinners..."But wisdom is proved right by all her children." Luke 7:35.

He hung out with sinners but never behaved like one. When He was with the religious dudes, He didn't get all hoty-toyty...Can't you just imagine how frustrating He must have been?

Being who I am and living the amazing life I have, has often sent my heart spinning....Here I would be, looking at the polished people assuming they were better than I....seriously, wouldn't you? I can be hot tempered, impetuous, emotional...okay, that just described my menopausal state, but in reality that is me!

I've spent a good portion of my life being so insecure that I was desperate for the approval of just about ANYONE in authority or whom I assumed was in authority over me. I assumed others were better because they were kinder or more successful or fill in the blank there...I had pretty low standards. I would be completely whipped around upon the discovery of their feet of clay. In theory, I always knew they had them...but when I peaked under the flowing robes and saw them...I was often set aside because I had actually seen them. I wasn't playing right.

In the last couple of years, I've lost more friends than I gained. I have, again, been spun around by it...but this last go around, I didn't crumble. Now don't think I didn't cry, 'cause you know I did...sometimes a lot. To some degree, I didn't have a chance to think twice but to stand firm in Truth...and I have found that Truth is still relative, even to believers. Compromising the Truth is a game of folly and I didn't play right. I paid for it...Oh boy have I ever.

 Now don't think for a minute I was standing on a pompous foot  and yelling from a street corner, "SINNERS! SINNERS!!!!!!!!!!" I simply asked that we pray, that we work towards deliverance, that we speak the Truth and deal with the problem. Needing as much forgiveness as I do, I just assumed that everyone knew that they did too...Not being willing to pretend something isn't wrong, is not a gift I have. The problem with having an elephant in the room is that it will crap on the rug...the clean up is way more involved than just removing the darn elephant. I just don't play right.

By now, you know that I am not all that "that" and a bag of chips...or least you should know that by now! When I get to Glory, I have no doubt there is a list of "should" haves and a whole bunch of "could" haves that are waiting for me...but I am beginning to realize that there are going to be a lot of, "That's MY girl" too. I am nothing short of nothing with out Him but with Him? Yeah, I'm pretty hot stuff!

I played by His rules and I am all the better for it...Jesus, friend of sinners...of whom I have often been the worst.

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Schools out for this school nurse!!!!!!!!!


Over stated? Perhaps....Schools out for summer! Last night we spent the evening parodying "One Day More" from Le Mis and the brevity was welcome given that earlier I had a temper tantrum over my child who had broken my favorite bowl and the disastrous  kitchen...I cussed like an ER nurse and I think I made some words up. Just bein' real with ya's.  I know I can't have nice things so lets just move on...guilt trip to continue on another time.

 I had the best preceptor EVER in my co-worker Sharon. She is simply the kindest woman I have ever met...with a gift for sarcasm that makes me want to be her friend forever and ever. She even allowed me to Pinterest something in her office...seriously, am I blessed or what?  When I grow up (meaning when I have been at this in 10 years like she has been) I want to be just like her, just taller and probably more fresh. But you get it.

That said, what of this year? Oiy...if I were a drinking woman...okay, stop laughing at that and lets get back to the year, shall we?

Being a school nurse this year was just a few chapters short of having a "Cherry Ames" novel on our hands here...seriously, all I needed was my cap...

There were days when I could not say "It is well with my soul" because it was so disturbed with in me. I learned more than I knew I needed to know...and how desperately I need His grace way more than I need my own ability. It was sufficient, His grace I mean.

But I made a promise back in December to the blogesphere and my own heart...that I would remember not to forget. But I did. I didn't pray every day as I said I would. I didn't keep my own struggles in the perspective of what I said I would.

In the last two weeks or so, I remembered. Yes, I had a tough year, very...but it wasn't Sally Cox RN tough. Sally Cox RN, you remember, is the school nurse from Sandy Hook. She buried how many of the children who's immunization records she went over with a fine tooth comb. She buried her principle and her co-workers.  We all have moved on...I can't imagine she or her co-workers or the families ever will. 

So when you are relaxing or working or NOT reading with the kids...remember Sally Cox RN.  When it all seems heavy, remember them all.

Blessed and Humble summer all!


Friday, June 7, 2013

Go get 'em!

 What is a blog for if not to brag on my kid? Elizabeth is about to graduate from High is her last day. She has complete and succeeded at what she was given to do. Why do we celebrate an accomplishment that was required? I mean, in all honesty, a high school graduate is seriously just completing the base minimum of what is expected of any kid in our country. I often remind my kids that their Poppy was on his way to fight in the Korean War by the time he was why do we make such a fuss out of doing something so cushy like graduating from high school?

Maybe we celebrate out of habit. When my own grandmother graduated from high school in the '20's it was a big meant that you were able to stay in school instead of working to put food on the table for your family. A generation later it meant that the kids of the greatest generation had successfully given to their kids what they were not given themselves. To my generation it meant we were heading off to college...for many of us we were the first to do so. My brother was the first to go to college in our extended family and the first to become an officer in the Navy, I became the first RN...that is a lot of accomplishment in a very short time.

But for Liz's generation what does it mean? I think it is the ending of "go do this" and the beginning of "what do you want to do" my dear. From this point on, she gets to choose how she learns, where she learns, and even the why of her learning. She gets to start a real job in a real office and drive and take trains and go to a school that is no longer paid for by the good tax payers around her. It has suddenly become HER LIFE.

HER LIFE? HER FAITH? HER LOVES and HER HATES? Wait a minute! WHY am I celebrating? Apron strings are getting cut with a hack saw but certainly not a scissor! Sigh...

Do I trust that I gave her everything she needs to go out in to the big, bad world? Some days. I told her about Jesus...I told her and I showed her. Or at least I tried. She will still ask, some times, what I think...but she is a woman who knows what she wants, as much as any about-to-be-18 year old woman can or thinks she can. I figure I have about four or five more years before she realizes I am not a complete idiot...but that is as it should be.

What can I say? I am so proud of what she chose to do in High School from rowing to theater...although referring to herself as a "thespian" just about sent her little brother into a panic..."No, Jack...not a 'lesbian' but a 'thespian' and yes those are two different things."  We did nice work there John...all by the grace given to a couple of parents who didn't even know how much we needed it until a Lizzy Lou came along and changed us forever...for the better.

Go get 'em tiger!